


the syllables melt away

by streetlights



Category: Subarashiki Kono Sekai | The World Ends With You
Genre: Curtain Fic, Domestic, Fluff, Friendship, Future Fic, Gen, Kid Fic, M/M, Parenthood, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-27
Updated: 2014-06-27
Packaged: 2018-02-06 11:09:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1855870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/streetlights/pseuds/streetlights
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Neku learns how to cook, lands a stable enough job, rediscovers old friends, resolves a dispute he has with an important partner, falls in love, possibly gets married, and becomes a father. But not in that order.</p><p>Or: it’s eight years into the future, and Joshua talks Neku into adopting a baby in his place. They may or may not fall in love along the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. [March] Week 3

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the TWEWY Bang last year. I wasn't able to finish it, and I haven't touched this fic since. I hope to eventually continue this, but seeing as this is a very long (but fluffy!) [curtain fic](http://www.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CurtainFic) set in the future, and that the cutoff length for each chapter is rather long, and that I now have other commitments in life, it will be a while before I get back to this. So... I'll just leave this here.
> 
> I would also like to thank my TWEWY Bang partner [theeyeofthetigger](http://theeyeofthetigger.tumblr.com/) for this wonderful [companion art piece](http://subasekabang.tumblr.com/post/63324650971/title-you-spoil-her-more-than-i-do-warnings-n-a). I haven't actually reached this part in my writing yet, but hopefully we'll get there!

He doesn't always see him, but he knows he's trying to communicate.

He lets him know about things he absolutely _doesn't_ need to know in the most unnecessary manner. Joshua probably thinks he’s being inconspicuous, but he fails badly in Neku’s opinion. Lately Neku’s been made aware of ‘random’ information he gets from seemingly coincidental methods (e.g. flying newspapers, posters he wouldn’t usually give a second glance, and unfamiliar thoughts inserted inside his head at random intervals throughout the week). It’s a lot more difficult to ignore Joshua’s efforts than to just let things be, even though his way of seeking attention is a bit roundabout.

Neku never really understood Joshua’s way of doing things anyway.

Sometimes, he sees _them._ They see him too, of course; 777 and his crew sometimes give him a friendly wave when the crowds are thin. Most of the time it’s pure coincidence (Kariya just shrugs it off like it's no big deal, and Konishi is too busy to even notice who she's bumped into). Other times the meetings seem contrived and planned, and Neku isn't really sure whether Kitaniji's occasional praises are genuine or not.

It's not as if his art is godly or anything. He's still miles from being the next CAT, and work is still hard to come by.

All in all, he has a very peculiar experience with the supernatural. His experiences are so frequent and contrived that Neku’s pretty sure it’s the supernatural that’s trying to get _his_ attention rather than the other way around. It's not like it's a bad thing though. Sometimes he hears Joshua's voice, but it's a rare luxury. Usually, he can just feel someone imprinting something in his head, and he's learned to distinguish which thoughts are his and which aren't. At least, he thinks he does. These thoughts don’t appear too frequently, but when they do they are mostly nonsensical comments about the awful life choices and fashion disasters happening to the people around him, as if there's this constant live commentary stuck in his head, waiting to critique and metaphorically bite the head off the next girl that happens to look Neku's way on the train.

It's ridiculous. But he listens anyway.

Neku talks back a lot. It's kind of invasive to think that Joshua would listen for his responses by reading his mind, and while Neku has given up on hiding anything from him, he still likes to think that Joshua respects his need for privacy enough to let him have his own thoughts for himself. He doesn't know if Joshua's listening, but he talks all the same.

It's kind of sad, really. The first few months were a little awkward, with people staring at him when they catch him talking to himself for too long. But then months stretched to years and awkward evolved to weird and, eventually, pathetic. Neku likes to think he has moved on, and that Joshua has moved on, but they both still try because they know that they're both still listening.

So they talk. It's not the most conventional way to talk, and they certainly don't have, well, _conversations_ , but it's enough. Neku gets to learn more about how the Reapers are doing, and Joshua gets glimpses of how Neku's life is in this optimal Shibuya. They know enough about each others' worlds, but not enough about each other. It's more than Neku expected to have, to be honest.

They don't see each other. They _never_ see each other, and perhaps that's a good thing. Neku doesn't think he can stop himself from hurting Joshua when the time comes. Reasons would vary from _why didn't you ever visit?_ to _you're an asshole_ and _oh yeah, thanks for killing me and making me wear those stupid gothic lolita dresses, those cordyceps were fucking awful by the way._

… Okay, so maybe not. For all his glowering, Neku doesn’t think he can really _hurt_ Joshua. It’s been so long. He’s not even the slightest bit angry anymore; they’re just rehashes of what he used to feel because that’s all he has left of him.

So when Joshua, still looking like his annoying fifteen-year-old self (even though it's been _years_ and everyone else has aged like normal people), knocks on his door for the first time in eight years with a _baby_ wailing in his arms, well...

"Shit," Neku breathes out. Because yeah, he missed Joshua, but he's also kind of pissed about the not-seeing-him-in-eight-years part, and it's also three in the fucking morning, and is that a _baby?_ Neku blinks and tries to glare at Joshua. He is _not_ ready, nor is he awake enough, for shit like this.

Joshua tsks at him, bouncing the baby in his arms in an attempt to calm her. There is a heavy-looking bag slipping off his shoulder. "Didn't your mother teach you not to swear in front of children?" He gives this amused smile of his, like it's not lost on him that _he_ has the appearance of a child right now. "Aren't you going to let me in?"

Neku stares at him a bit more before finally deciding that yes, Joshua is indeed in front of his house at three in the morning with a crying baby in his arms, and no, there's probably nothing he can do about it. He lets Joshua in, closes the door with a loud sigh, and pads to the kitchen to fix himself and his guest a cup of coffee. He is _not_ awake enough for this shit.

Joshua declines the offer, shrugs his bag off, and rocks the baby in his arms instead. She doesn't stop crying.

"So... what's with the baby?" Neku asks awkwardly as he stirs his coffee and takes a sip. Funny, this isn't how he imagined he would meet Joshua again. He thought it'd be in front of Hachiko, or even Dead God's Pad. He thought Joshua might even look a bit older, if only because it's too weird to imagine himself talking to someone who looks eight years younger, when in actuality Joshua’s probably older than him. It still looks weird, now that it's happening to him.

It's not like he thought they would go out and have ramen like normal people, but he certainly didn't imagine the baby in the picture.

"She's yours," Joshua says casually, taking a seat. Neku politely aims his spit take towards the sink.

_"Excuse me?"_

Joshua smirks up at him, still rocking the baby gently in his arms. She's still crying. "If you want her to be, that is. Of course, you know I'm going to make you say yes."

Neku places his mug down and pinches the bridge of his nose, looking up. "Oh my _god_..."

"I never pegged you to be the religious type, but that's good. She'll learn good morals. As long as you're not too uptight about it. I know some fundamentalists can be close-minded."

"Nice to see you again too, asshole. I'm doing fine, in case you're wondering," Neku says drily. He stares at Joshua, then the baby. She looks decidedly unhappy and she seems to be determined to make this fact known to just about everyone and their mother. "What did you do to her? She'll wake the neighbors up."

"She's been crying since I took her with me. I'm trying not to find that insulting. Here. Hold her," Joshua orders, promptly placing her in Neku's arms and taking a swig from Neku's mug. "Maybe you can calm her down."

"I- what?" But the baby is already in his arms, so Neku holds on so he doesn't drop her. He tries to remember if his mother actually taught him how to hold a baby properly.

"Make sure you're supporting her head," Joshua murmurs, his lips pressed to Neku's coffee mug. It's only now Neku notices how _tired_ Joshua looks, all tight lines and dark circles. Maybe it looks worse because he looks so much younger than he actually is. "I don't know how Sanae does it. He just cradles her to sleep, like magic. He probably does something to her milk when I'm not looking."

Neku snorts, trying to imagine Mr. H doing just that. His lack of movement gets the baby acting up again, so he tries to mimic the way Joshua cradled the baby earlier and shushes her to silence. He has a moment of slight panic when he thought the baby might start crying _louder_ , but she eventually calms down and cries herself to sleep.

"See," Joshua says, gesturing to her with Neku's now empty mug. "You'd make a great mother, Neku."

Neku grimaces, partly for his lack of coffee. He continues to rock her at a steady pace and hums under his breath. Admittedly, the baby _is_ kind of cute to look at now that she’s not bawling her eyes out. "No, I bet you're just horrible at this. She’s tired, and she probably doesn't like you."

Joshua wrinkles his nose. "No, she doesn't," he says, sighing dramatically. He sets the coffee mug down. "Do you have a bed she can lie down in?"

Neku eyes him warily. "Are you going to leave me alone with her once we settle her down?"

Joshua smirks a little at that. "Oh, but you're doing such a splendid job already! I don't see why I should stay any longer."

_"Joshua."_

"Haha, don’t worry Neku." Joshua stands up and puts the mug in the sink, brushing against Neku's elbow in the process. "Of course I’ll stay. At least, until you’re comfortable enough with the idea of adopting her. I did promise I would make you say yes. Though it seems like I don't need to exert extra effort on that part. You're looking more motherly by the second."

"Fuck you."

"Language, Neku." He washes the mug with precise movements and sets it aside to dry. The action comes naturally, as if he's been to Neku’s kitchen so many times before he might as well have lived there. It's kind of off-putting. "Well then," Joshua says. "Bed?"

* * *

 

Neku lives in a modest apartment. It's not too big and not too small, but it certainly looks a lot more spacious than the average home. It's not that Neku is a minimalist, though sometimes he tries to be. He has a lot less clutter compared to Eri, and whatever mess he makes is eventually contained in a semi-orderly fashion. He doesn't have a lot of luxuries; he skips on most of them for practical purposes. He forgoes owning a TV and DVD player in favor of a powerful laptop with good software and internet connection; he skips the cookware and just buys a microwave because he ends up eating take out and going to Ramen Don anyway; he makes do with a single-sized bed in the guest room to convert the master bedroom into his own art studio.

He does, however, spend his hard-earned money on a good pair of headphones and stereo. Joshua once commented on this during one of his many imprints, but tonight he is quiet, only piping up here and there to comment how the lighting is too dark, or that the studio is a mess, or that there is an obvious lack of food in the refrigerator.

"Did you come here just to criticize my apartment?" Neku asks as he rummages his closet for a blanket. "Like, I know you do that with pretty much every aspect of my life whenever you’re inside my head but..."

"Don't be absurd," Joshua says. He waltzes towards the bathroom for his next inspection. "I'm doing this for the baby."

Neku pulls out of his closet his old Doraemon blanket and pointedly avoids the way Joshua’s raising his eyebrows at it. "Right,” he says sarcastically. “'Cause it's not like I said yes yet."

He shakes his head and walks to his bedroom, bundling the baby up with the blanket and taking extra care not to accidentally suffocate her in the process.

He spends a few moments watching her breathe in her sleep, and it's kind of nice to see her content now, which is a disturbing thought in and of itself. If he grew even slightly attached Joshua might actually succeed in talking him into adopting the baby, which is not a good thing. Joshua is pretty good with words after all.

Neku sits down gingerly on the bed, taking care not to disturb the baby, and frowns at the possibility of having to take the couch tonight. Or worse, the floor.

"You'll say yes," Joshua says confidently, shutting the bathroom lights off. He hovers around several rooms, inspecting them and wrinkling his nose. As he draws nearer to Neku’s room again, he calls out, "You should think about cleaning your bathroom, by the way. And less on the hair products. She doesn’t need all those chemicals."

"Yes sir," Neku mutters. It's not like he would use those on the baby anyway. He’d be sure to use baby shampoo and - no, stop. Dangerous train of thought. Neku sighs. "Where did she come from, anyway? Does she have a name?"

"She doesn't. We didn't want to name her because nobody wanted to keep her."

"So now you're dumping your problem on me?"

"Exactly," Joshua says. He saunters over and leans against the doorframe, crossing his arms. "I’m sure you’ve already noticed, but Reapers can still get hungry or tired or sick like any other human. They eat ramen and swallow cough drops when needed. It’s only logical to conclude that, even under special circumstances, one’s body does not magically stop functioning after death. Well, one of our Reapers learned the hard way that… certain body parts will still function the way they are supposed to, and that the body will still produce hormones and such when sufficiently aroused.”

“So… one of your minions knocked someone up, then?”

Joshua sighs at that. “It's rare that anything comes of it, though it’s not impossible. Most Reapers are aware that the possible consequences of such actions should not be taken lightly. But nevertheless, meddling too much with the status quo is against the rules. This might have only happened twice or thrice before, and this is definitely the first time it has happened during _my_ time as Composer. Anyway, yes, a Reaper got someone from the RG pregnant, so now we have a Reaper baby nobody wants to care for."

Neku straightens up. "Wait, are you saying that this baby might grow _wings?_ " He tries to imagine how the baby might be able to live a normal life growing up in the RG like that. He cringes at the thought.

Joshua shrugs. "It's highly unlikely. Generally, you have to be dead to become a Reaper, and as you can tell, she's clearly alive. But on the off-chance that she _does_ grow wings, she'll have to learn how to hide it from the RG. I doubt things will end up in that direction though."

"Oh _god..._ "

"Of course if that ever happens, she might also phase in and out of the RG, though I'm pretty sure she wouldn't, she's completely human in my opinion-"

"And you think I'll be able to handle that? Her? Handle _her?_ " Neku stands up and paces across the floor. Shit, this is happening. Shit.

Joshua gives him an incredulous look. And then, in all seriousness, "Yes, Neku. You've taken a babysitting job before, haven't you?"

"Nine-year olds are different, and that didn't even last long."

"Haven't you ever thought of having kids?"

Neku stares at him. "You did not just seriously ask me that."

"You can think of this as an extended babysitting job."

"No."

"What if I asked this of you as a favor-"

" _No_ Joshua." Neku paces faster, and comes up with no less than twenty different pin combinations he could use to possibly erase the offending Reaper that brought this mess to his afterafterlife. "What makes you think I can take care of a baby? If you haven't noticed, I'm freelancing right now-"

"That just means your schedule is flexible and you would have more time than the rest of us to take care of her."

"-and and I can't cook-"

"Oh please, all she ever drinks is milk."

"-and I have no idea how to be a dad-"

"You'll learn on the job."

"-and I think you're nuts. And an asshole." Neku stops walking holes on his floor and looks at Joshua directly in the eyes. He has waited all of eight years to say this to his face. "You're an asshole."

"Duly noted." Joshua smiles, amused. "Any other observations you’d like to mention, dear?"

"Joshua, she's a _human being_. I can't take care of her," Neku says, finally plopping down on the bed once again and belatedly realizing that he might have woken the baby up with his abrupt movements. He flinches at the thought. She stirs a little, but is thankfully still asleep. When he is sure he has not disturbed her, Neku turns back to Joshua, hands gesturing around for emphasis. "It's not a matter of want; I literally don't think I have the capability to keep anything else besides myself alive."

Joshua lifts a finger up. "You have a cactus in front of your apartment," he says. Then, as an afterthought, "And you _did_ keep all of Shibuya alive..."

"Yes, well, cacti don't poop or eat your pocky sticks or cry for eighteen years." Neku crosses his arms and fights the urge to rub his eyes. What time is it, four? Five? How does Joshua even manage to entertain these thoughts at five in the morning? "And Reaper Games don't count."

"If you're worried about pocky sticks, you can always buy more."

"That is not the _point._ "

"No, you're completely missing it," Joshua agrees. "Neku, I don't think anybody is ever ready for parenthood, even if they're expecting it. And I don't trust this kid with anyone else, to be honest. You're headstrong, and you care even if you don't show it. Your job makes it perfect for you to make time for her. You're _terrifyingly capable_ once you're committed to something. You'll do great."

Joshua smiles. And then, "Her father would feel better if you were the one to take care of her."

Neku stares at Joshua for saying that, and wonders how much of his words are true, and how much are for the purposes of manipulating him into agreeing. Of course he'd play a guilt card when he sees one; make him feel like he owes something to someone even if he doesn't. Of course he'd say that.

Neku closes his eyes. "Eight years," he mumbles to himself. "I haven’t seen you in eight years. I waited for _this_ for eight years? Whoop-de-fucking-do."

Joshua watches him silently from the side.

"Is she yours?" Neku asks without looking his way. He knows she's not; he _hopes_ she's not. It just doesn't seem like something Joshua would do, even for kicks. Not that it's any of his business what Joshua's up to these days.

"No."

"Is she Pi-Face's then?"

This one earns him a laugh, which Neku feels relieved about. He's not sure what he'd do if he had Sho's child in his hands. Just the mere thought of it scares him, and he’s afraid he might drop the baby the next time the thought enters his mind.

"No, Neku,” Joshua says, giggling. “She's not his, or else I wouldn't even bother."

Neku's snort turns into a chuckle.

The truth is that he knows next to nothing about parenting. He's a single twenty-three-year-old freelance graphic designer, and though there have been a couple of girls interested in him, he never actually thought about settling down with anyone. He always thought it would be with Shiki when that happened, but best friends don't necessarily turn out to be the best lovers either, so there's that.

"Sometimes I really wonder where your confidence in me comes from. Are you going to keep making life-altering decisions for me without _actually_ consulting me every time we meet?" he asks in a dry tone.

"You make your life so easy to plan around, Neku," Joshua says, amused. And damn it, of course he's right. Neku's life is so flexible right now; he might as well run for president while he's at it.

It's not his fault clients are not the easiest to come by. He's still in the making-your-own reputation stage and trying desperately not to seem like another CAT, but as someone with individual talent.

And, okay, aside from small projects and a waiting phone call confirmation from some indie record label, there's really not much else going on at the moment. Neku usually has a couple of projects that keep him busy and happy, but he’s hit a dry spell lately. He shouldn’t really be surprised that Joshua would choose this moment to capitalize on that. Neku wouldn't admit that he's bored but he's... well, he has time. He has plenty of time.

Too much time, actually.

But parenting?

"If you're having doubts," Joshua says. "She's not really that much of a handful. I imagine things are easier if you learn to want this." He turns to Neku with a serious look. " _Do_ you want this, Neku?"

And the thing is, Joshua asks a lot of things he already knows the answer to.

Neku groans and messes his hair up in frustration. "This is ridiculous."

"Neku."

"This isn't something I can answer at," he checks the clock on the wall, "five ten in the morning."

But the fact that he hesitates to answer at all says something, and to be honest, that scares him.

He means to leave the room, maybe get a bit of fresh air, but Joshua's hand reaches out and holds him by the wrist, which, okay, wow. How long has it been since they actually touched each other? Neku's starting to think Joshua might be onto him, and of course he'd use that to his advantage, wouldn't he? The bastard.

"If you don't take care of her,” Joshua says. “then she'll be left under my care. And my occupation does not allow me time for that. You, on the other hand, have nothing pressing to do at the moment. There's nothing stopping you from saying yes."

"I don't know how to raise a kid," Neku says flatly.

"So you'll learn. That never stopped you before."

"Please stop comparing this to my incredible luck during the Game eight years ago. They're really not the same." Neku sighs, pulling his hand away. "How old is she?"

"Three weeks. More or less. I have to get back on you on when her actual birth date is. I can't guarantee that someone remembers though."

Neku doesn't fancy himself as someone overly affectionate or sentimental about the little things, but he still thinks it's _terrible_ that no one even bothered to remember when the baby was born, or that she remained nameless for three weeks.

He wonders just what kind of environment she’s been living in for the past three weeks.

"You... you said you don't trust her with anyone else?" he asks, a little hesitant.

Joshua smiles triumphantly. That's not a good sign. "I trust that you'll do an excellent job, Neku. You should trust my judgment."

Neku bites his lip. He thinks about names and the child’s obvious lack of parental figure; of how his little girl will grow up to steal his pocky sticks and hide in his Doraemon blankets.

He's starting to think of her as _his_ now, and that's more than a little bit troubling. He doesn’t usually think this way.

On the other hand, leaving her under Joshua's care seems to be more trouble than it's worth, if her constant crying and Joshua's inability to calm her down seems to be any indication. Neku would fare better as a dad really, and that's saying something.

That’s _really_ saying something. It’s a horrifying thought.

"… I'll think about it," he says finally. He regrets it as soon as it’s been said.

But Joshua smiles at him, relieved, victorious, and a little amused. It should be nothing, but when he sees it, he thinks Joshua should smile more often.

* * *

 

Logically, Neku is acceptable for the job.

Oh he's _far_ from perfect, and he has a mountain of things he needs to learn. He's definitely not the first choice, or even the second or third. But he's adequate. He has time at the very least. And he's available. That automatically makes him more qualified than, say, other people who are busy enough to actually run something resembling a life. Which is everybody else, apparently.

It's not like Neku doesn't have a life. He hasn't given up on trying to 'expand his horizons' and 'live in the moment,' but life isn't always going to be a smooth ride. People will eventually discover a quiet lull in between one event and another and Neku doesn't think there's anything wrong with trying to enjoy that. He just didn't expect that lull to be the calm before the storm.

Joshua's banking on Neku's steep learning curve, as if his potential as a pin-wielding fighter of death could ever directly translate to his abilities in parenting. It's not very reassuring.

They make their way back to the kitchen after Joshua assured Neku that “It’s okay to leave her alone in the bed, this will only be a quick second,” and promptly putting pillows all around her just in case. He picks his bag up and gives it to Neku. It's filled with bottles and milk and all kinds of baby things.

Neku looks at the sheer amount of them stuffed in there and wonders why he lets himself get into these things.

"She gets fussy around everyone," Joshua says. "But especially so during the evening."

Neku snorts. "Well yeah. She wants a mother. Not death guardians and city gods."

Joshua's lips quirk up at that. He opens the bag and proceeds to show Neku the basics of sterilizing the bottles and preparing a feed, all while rattling off a list of things Neku should be aware of.

"She likes to be bundled up, but not too much," he starts off. "Remember to always support her head and body when you pick her up. She calms down faster when listening to steady and calming sounds, like white noise or someone's heartbeat, so ease up on your loud music. Konishi said you don't have to give her baths all the time because that might dry her skin. A sponge will do for now. I've read that babies need around sixteen hours of sleep every day, so try not to make her cry too much. Or rather, try not to make her cry more than she already does. I can never tell if she's hungry or tired or needs a diaper change, so good luck with that."

Neku stares at him. This is a bit overwhelming.

"She sucks her fingers a lot and pulls on her ears. Watch her carefully in case she hurts herself. And don't let her sleep on her stomach. She might suffocate. Megumi almost left her like that once, but thankfully Konishi noticed and-"

"You keep mentioning her. Did the Iron Maiden ever have kids?"

"She worked with children for a time in her previous life." Joshua shrugs, shaking the baby bottle. "She'll refuse to take care of the baby though."

"And you think I won't?"

"No, I know you would." He gives Neku a meaningful look, smiling playfully. "But I also know you will eventually let me talk you into it."

Neku rolls his eyes. "Yeah, no kidding."

"Konishi is capable, but I trust you more."

"Gee, thanks," Neku mumbles. He doesn't think he's being a doormat, but it still sucks that a Very Important Part of his life can be easily directed into whatever direction the Composer desires. And they both know it.

Joshua watches him in silence, and he doesn't turn away even when Neku notices and looks him in the eye. It's frustrating that he can never quite tell what Joshua wants.

Eventually, Joshua breaks the silence. "I should get going."

"What, already?"

Joshua raises an eyebrow. "Do you want me to skip this week's Game and just erase everyone then?"

Neku blinks, before shaking his head violently. "No."

"Alright then." Joshua nods at him. He almost reaches out, but he stops his hand in midair and pulls back. He says instead, "You'll do great, Neku. Will you show me out?"

Neku nods back at him. He doesn't necessarily agree with his previous statement.

"We really should stop meeting just so you can keep changing my life," Neku says. "Ever heard of just getting coffee?"

"It was lovely meeting you too, Neku," Joshua replies. He doesn't look back. "Take care of her now."

"You're still coming back to take her if I change my mind though.”

Joshua stops and throws back a smirk. "Of course." He shrugs, like the thought doesn't even cross his mind. Once he's out the door, Neku shuts himself in, leans his whole weight back, and slides down the wall. He brings a hand up to rub his face.

He glances at the clock. Five-forty AM.

The baby starts crying in his room again.

"Fuck," he breathes out, eyes widening, and for the first time he feels more awake than ever. "What did I just agree to?”

* * *

 

Neku spends the rest of his morning not sleeping, making more than four cups of coffee, calming a crying baby with promises of formulated milk and soon-to-be-bought toys, and opening forty seven tabs in his browser window in a panicked effort of googling variations of 'how to stop a baby from crying' and 'how to stop people from planning your life for you without your permission.' Neither search proves to be successful as Neku's attention is more focused on the baby than his computer.

It really is only by pure luck that Neku discovers the best position to get the baby to calm down, which is with her sucking on a pacifier on her back, her head close to his chest, with him squished to the wall. She settles contently on the bed and Neku just kind of stays there in his uncomfortable position, listening to her breathe.

When the baby finally falls silent, Neku allows himself to relax a bit more and to dwell on his inconvenient circumstance, and how he ever got himself to agree to this in the first place.

At some point, it crosses his mind how Joshua might have possibly _imprinted_ the idea of taking care of a baby inside his head. That would make it easier for him to persuade Neku to think about adopting the kid (which, Neku insists, is still not a final decision).

It's a possibility that he doesn't want to entertain.

Because Joshua may be, well, _Joshua_ , and his track record of getting people to do things for him without their knowledge isn't exactly something to boast about, but he's still Neku's friend in the end. Neku can't say he's changed, or that he's a saint, but he’s aware that there's more to Joshua than the Composer Neku spent a week snarking and bantering with during his very short afterlife.

And besides, there’s the whole ‘trust your partner’ thing. Neku trusts that Joshua wouldn’t do that to him. That’s bordering on manipulation, and while it’s not too far a stretch to say that Joshua’s not above that, Neku still owes him the benefit of the doubt at least.

Later, he'll berate himself for not continuing this train of thought further. But the things that happen later don’t happen now, and right now Neku gives up on sulking in favor of making preparations and learning what he ought to know about babies. He takes this as a sign of human growth.

He removes himself slowly from the bed a few hours later and, after a very hasty internet search, compiles a list of things he thinks the baby will need. He calls Shiki up to buy all those things for him ASAP, adding that she should _not_ ask about it, and would she please not tell Eri about this?

But since the universe’s favor isn’t on Neku, it's Eri who answers the phone instead of Shiki. Oops.

"Sure, I won't tell Eri," Eri says mockingly from the other line. "Why don't you tell me all the dirty little secrets you keep in your journal while you're at it? You know, like the guy you draw on your sketchbook – the Special One, Neku, not your regular old sketchbooks. Or… oh! That one date you and Shiki never wanted to talk about-"

Neku groans. He lifts his hand to rub his face, and remembers that he still owes her one for missing out on their recent fashion show. "Eri..."

"Neku, you hardly ever take the initiative to call me so let me have my fun. I'm expecting an explanation when I get there." She pauses. And then, in a whispery, teasing voice, she adds, "Wait, you didn't have drunk sex with someone, did you?"

"What? Fu- I mean, no! I’m not that kind of person. Just. I need these things and I can’t leave the house, so could you buy them for me? Please?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm on my way, princess~"

Neku rolls his eyes and hangs up. The baby stirs in the bed, waking up. He looks at the baby with a defeated look.

"This is all your fault," he says, but he knows deep down he doesn't really mean it.

The baby just looks at him with curious eyes and makes little baby noises.

"You're lucky you're fuc- cute. You're lucky you're _really_ cute." He sighs. He’ll have to start watching his language now, and he’s never been good at that. "Don't tell anyone I said that, alright?"

Saliva dribbles down her chin, but she curls her hand around his index finger and coos at him cutely.

* * *

 

By lunchtime, Neku has sufficiently bonded with the baby long enough that he's starting to think of what to name her, because referring to her as just 'the baby' sounds impersonal and wrong and awkward.

He's looking up baby names on the internet when Eri and Shiki arrive with bags and bags of diapers and milk and baby clothes in their arms. But since this is Eri and Shiki, they also bought things Neku didn't think he'd need, but he really does. Like baby powder, and wipe cloths, and a couple of thick paperbacks on how to care for babies.

He greets them, takes one look at their shopping bags, and mutters, “I asked for diapers, not the whole baby section of the department store.”

He wonders how much milk actually costs and if he’s crazy enough to touch the money he’s been saving up for the drawing tablet he’s been eyeing in Molco.

"Neku!" Shiki says. She walks over with wide eyes, like she couldn't believe what she was seeing. "I thought Eri was just joking, but then she dragged me to shop for _diapers_ and - what happened, Neku?"

Before Neku could get a word in, Eri pipes up. "I told you to keep a condom with you at all times in case something like this happens!" she says, grinning.

Neku sputters. He deeply regrets skipping that fashion show now.

You see, the thing about Eri is that she grew up to be a straightforward girl with a strong personality. And she loves to tease people. Particularly Neku. But that’s probably only because Neku would either quip back at her sarcastically or just let her tease. It’s their weird way of showing affection for one another. It’s a dynamic he doesn’t necessarily share with Shiki and the others.

Today though, he doesn’t think he’s in the mood to banter.

"What the hell, Eri?" he says, half-glaring and half stumbling. "It's not like that! And keep your voice down. She’s sleeping."

"She? So it’s true!" There's a mischievous glint in Eri's eyes. "So, what’s the scoop? Come on, you can tell us! I promise Shiki won't freak out. Right Shiki?"

Shiki rolls her eyes at her fondly, but keeps stealing worried glances at Neku. "Don't mind her, Neku. I don't know what's going on, but you don't have to worry about us judging you or anything."

Neku gives them an exasperated look. "Shiki, not you too."

Shiki giggles, putting her hands up. "I'm just saying. But seriously Neku, what's going on? I know this can't be a babysitting job because you tried that back in college and you nearly ripped one of our dresses in frustration." And then, after a beat, "Eri's still bitter about that, by the way."

Eri nods mournfully. “Shiki spent _days_ on that.”

Neku shakes his head at them, because he can’t believe they’re still on about that. “That was, what, four years ago? I said I was sorry.” He plops down on a chair, stifling a long yawn, which earns him a concerned look from Shiki.

“Neku, are you okay?” she asks, sitting down beside him. “You look really tired.”

Eri nods her head in agreement. “You _do_ look terrible. I’m guessing you didn’t eat breakfast, either.”

Neku shrugs. Now that she mentioned it, he did forget to eat this morning _._ But then, he’s not one to stock up on too much food anyway, and he usually just grabs a bite to eat on his way to wherever he has to be. Besides, he’s not sure he can handle stepping one foot outside his house when he still doesn’t have a clue what to do with the baby when they’re _inside_.

“I haven’t slept since -  I don’t know, three in the morning? - when Joshua brought the baby-”

“Wait, _Joshua?_ ” Shiki asks in surprise at the same time Eri raises an eyebrow and says, “That guy you've been pining for years?”

Neku gives Eri a look.

“Oh don’t look at me like that, Sakuraba. I've seen your sketchbooks. You sketch the same dude over and over. That’s clearly the symptoms of pining.”

“I’m not pining,” Neku says, rather grumpily. Eri crosses her arms. “I’m _not._ ”

“Right,” she scoffs. “Sure.”

Shiki shakes her head at them. “ _Anyway._ He brought a baby over and, what?” She tilts her head. “You’re babysitting for him?”

“… You could call it that. An extended babysitting job that could last eighteen years.”

Eri lets out a gasp. “So… you’re a dad now?”

Neku looks up at her so fast he could have hurt his neck. He… never thought of it that way. What do you call someone who unknowingly signed up to take care of a baby (he still insists this is temporary) because some idiot was irresponsible? A father? Was there an alternative to that name? Did Joshua bring her here with this in mind?

“What? I-I guess so?” And then, “Shit. I _am_ a dad. Shit. This is ridiculous.”

Suddenly the whole situation seems very daunting. Ridiculous, yes. But also daunting.

He didn’t think taking care of a baby would mean he had to teach her how to read and write and not be an idiot. Getting her to sleep is hard enough.

Who the fuck signs their friend up to be a dad? What the fuck, Joshua.

Eri watches Neku deal with this realization and tries to play the whole thing off the way she knows how.

“Neku! I can’t believe you reached this milestone before I could!” she exclaims. She holds her chest in mock pain. “Ugh, I have failed. Oh the _shame_. To think Neku would snag a boy before me!”

“Oh Eri, quit with the dramatics.” Shiki says. “We don’t even know if Neku wanted this.”

“Well, I certainly didn’t _ask_ for it,” Neku says.

“Oh please,” Eri says. “That’s just Neku-talk for _no, I don’t mind taking care of my boyfriend’s accident for him!_ ”

“It’s not an accident,” Neku adds quickly. Somehow, it doesn’t sit well to think of her as one. “I mean, at least she’s not _his_ accident. He… just happens to be the one who takes care of these messes, that’s all.”

Eri pokes his chest. “And now he needs help from _you._ Aw, Shiki, look. Our little Neku is growing up!”

“Ugh, shut up Eri.”

Shiki merely laughs at them. “Come on Eri, we’d better check if we can make some kind of lunch out of whatever’s in Neku’s fridge at the moment. I’m hungry, and I think Neku needs to eat something that’s not cup noodles.”

Neku nods at her gratefully, and despite what he says, he’s sort of glad someone else knows about his predicament.

* * *

 

It’s a late lunch, and Shiki fills up the conversation with both excitement about the baby and concerns about parenthood, while Eri is enthusiastic enough for all three of them. As for Neku, well, he’s not _excited_ per se. He’s actually still a bit nervous and clueless, and he’s plenty annoyed, but he also thinks the kid is adorable and that he should really decide on her name soon.

After all is said and done (Eri _finally_ forgives him for missing the fashion show), conversations about Joshua turned to conversations about the baby and how Neku is now a dad (it’s still big news to all of them, Neku included). This leads to Eri hyping over it and texting Beat and Rhyme, and Shiki being concerned and offering help and just generally being the one constant in Neku’s life that always helped him push through all the weird and difficult hurdles.

It could be all the hype Eri is generating about the baby. But the more they talk about it, the more everything else kind of blurs out until it’s all Neku mainly thinks about. Neku doesn’t think he’s starting to get attached or anything; it’s only part of human decency to see how the baby is doing.

(Also, he does kinda want Shiki and Eri to see the baby. So.)

So he eats quickly and talks quickly and leaves the table immediately after his last bite to check up on the baby, who is surrounded by pillows on all sides even though Neku doesn’t think she’s talented enough that she can achieve the impossible and roll over at three weeks old. Still, it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Shiki and Eri follow him to the room, and the noise wakes the baby up.

“Is that her?” Eri asks, eyes bright.

“Sorry,” Shiki says. “We didn’t mean to wake her up.”

Neku gathers the baby in his arms, bouncing her a bit. He’s getting better at this carrying thing, somewhat. “It’s okay. She only stays asleep for about two to four hours so I think she was about to wake up anyway.”

Or at least, that’s what the he read on the internet about sleeping newborns.

The baby gurgles at Neku and tugs at his collar.

Shiki giggles. “You look adorable, holding her like that. What’s her name?”

“She doesn’t have one yet. Do you guys have any suggestions? I’ve been looking at baby names for the past hour and nothing sounds right.” He looks up and notices both Shiki and Eri staring at him with amused faces. “What?”

“Oh, _nothing_. Hey, can I see her?” Eri says, walking up to him with Shiki in tow. "Okay. I knew she’d be cute, but you didn't tell me she'd be _this_ cute."

Neku rolls his eyes. "I'm glad you’re hyped over her."

"Aw, but she's worth hyping about! You didn't tell me little Hype-chan would be _this_ cute."

“Hype-chan?”

“Ignore her, she’s bad at making up names. Remember Fluff-kun?” Shiki says. She hovers over and watches the baby scrunch her face up at everyone crowding over her. “She looks so fragile. This is a bit of a big decision, Neku. Are you sure-”

Neku shakes his head. “No. But I already said yes, at least for now. So.”

Shiki laughs. “You don’t know how to be a parent.”

"No, I don’t.” There’s no argument there. Neku shrugs, watching the baby alternate from tugging his collar and warily looking at all these strangers watching her. She looks like she’s about to cry again. “Actually, I was just thinking. You're both girls. Don't girls have that, what was it, maternal instinct? So do you guys want to…"

There’s a tiny, very small voice inside him that wants them to say no.

He tries to ignore that tiny, very small voice inside him because it doesn’t make sense at all.

Eri backs away immediately. "Oh _no_."

"Eri, I know you at least plan on having kids once you find the right guy."

"No, Neku. He asked _you._ "

“But-!”

“No buts!” Eri wags her index finger at him. “She’s _your_ responsibility now.”

“Eri’s right, Neku,” Shiki says. She steps back a bit when the baby starts making fussy noises. “Joshua trusted you with her. Besides, we don’t really know the first thing about parenting, and we can’t make time for her either. We’d love to help out when we can, though.”

Neku grumbles, muttering under his breath about how _he_ doesn’t know the first thing about parenting either. He’s about to make some equally dry retort when the baby starts crying again, so instead he cradles her in his arms and mumbles, “I should change her diaper or feed her or something. Could you pass me her pacifier? It’s on the bed.”

Shiki nods and gets the pacifier for him. It takes a while, but soon the baby is calmed down enough, her pacifier bobbing up and down as she makes small baby noises again.

“See, Neku? You’re coping with this better than I probably could,” Shiki says. She smiles at him, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. “You’re doing a great job.”

Eri nods. “Don’t worry, Neku. You’ll do great.”

The baby tugs at his collar again, looking up at him with furrowed eyebrows as if she’s studying his face. Neku thinks it’s very intimate coming from her. She stares at him with her big, brown eyes, and he hopes that’s a good thing.

“Thanks guys,” he says absently. He’s not really sure what he’s thanking them for.

Eri and Shiki smile at him knowingly, and he thinks maybe they know.


	2. [April-May] Weeks 4-12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the unaware, Hype-chan is the fandom nickname for the [girl](http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120831230828/twewy/images/4/40/Solo_Remix_Unknown.png) who appears in the secret ending of Solo Remix. Who is she? We don't know.

The first month is a whirlwind of new routines and getting-used-tos. Taking care of a baby is no easy job, and it’s overwhelming enough that Neku’s life turns a 180 because of it.

Well, it’s more of a zigzag than a strict 180, because Hype-chan sleeps, eats, wakes, and pees at irregular intervals. It’s a different kind of challenge that keeps Neku on his toes. When he’s not fretting over distinguishing Hype-chan’s ‘hungry cry’ from her ‘sleepy cry’ and ‘I’m-just-really-fussy-so-I’ll-make-this-hell-for-you cry’, he’s reading baby books and baby articles from baby sites.

He calls her Hype-chan for now, if only because he has yet to decide on a name she would be stuck with for a lifetime.

It’s all very ridiculous and exhausting, and Neku’s not the most patient of people. But he was able to survive college, a freelancing job, and three weeks of mind games in the past. That has to count for something.

Shiki thinks it’s endearing the way Neku puts effort into everything he does when he’s committed, but Neku tries to explain that it’s not like that at all. He doesn’t plan on being a father. It’s only temporary, but _someone_ has to take care of the baby; and the more he thinks about it the more he disapproves of letting the Reapers take care of her.

“You’re getting attached to her,” Shiki points out with a knowing smile.

Neku shakes his head stubbornly. “No I’m not. She’s wearing me out, actually.”

He does think Hype-chan is kind of adorable though, but he doesn’t say this out loud. Babies are adorable by default anyway.

One of the hardest parts about this situation, however, is sharing his single bed with the baby. This is partly because he doesn’t feel comfortable letting Hype-chan out of his sight, but his public answer is that getting a new crib for her would probably cost him some of his savings. He sleeps when Hype-chan sleeps, and wakes when she wakes, so he never gets more than a couple hours of light sleep at a time. It’s exhausting, and Neku can’t say he feels good about it, but he presses on.

He thinks that being a parent (it’s still kind of weird to think of himself as one) is a fucking hard job. People should really give them more credit.

And so on the fourth night, Neku decides on better judgment to call his mother and ask for advice.

“I haven’t heard from you in so long, Neku!” his mother says. “You should visit some time. Your father misses you too, even if he doesn’t say this out loud.”

Neku rolls his eyes. His mother did say he got some of his traits from his father, despite the small emotional distance between them. “Mom, I have a favor to ask of you.”

His mother hums in response. Neku can imagine the gears in her head spinning. “A favor?”

“Yeah. I’m… babysitting for a friend. For the time being. He has some… urgent business and he needs someone to take care of his baby for now. Except I don’t know what exactly I should be doing. So…”

His mother laughs. “Honestly Neku, you don’t have to worry about being straightforward with me. You want me to help you through your first few days?”

“That… would be nice.”

“I’ll be there first thing in the morning then. I know how nerve-wracking parenting can be. Ah, I miss the days when you were still a baby. You were so chubby then. I think I still have your baby album here somewhere…”

Neku’s eyes widen, horrified. “Mom, _no_.”

“But you were so adorable back then! Remember when Aunt Michiko would always pinch your cheeks?”

“Of course I do.” Neku brings his hand up to his cheek in response, remembering how his aunt would pinch just a tad too much. He always wondered why people do that. “I hated that.”

“But you loved it when she would bring home presents! And you always used your tummy as your canvass. It was so difficult to wash the paint off your clothes, you know.” His mother laughs again. She seems to be enjoying herself. “I never imagined my son would agree to babysit, though. Didn’t you try this before in college? You’re not the most patient person in the world, Neku.”

Neku sighs. Doesn’t he know it. “I… kind of got talked into it.”

“Are you sure there’s nothing else I should know about?” she says, lighthearted and half serious. “My mother instincts are tingling, Neku.”

Neku swallows. “No. There’s nothing else.”

“Hmm…” She hums back, thinking. “Very well. I suppose you’re old enough to know when to ask for help. I shouldn’t hang over you anymore. But you will visit sometime, yes?”

Neku opens his mouth to give a vague answer. But then he thinks of Hype-chan, and how she would grow up and live on her own without him. It’s not like he would prevent her from having her own life, and he’s still stubborn about not being attached to her (despite what Shiki says), but he’s slowly getting used to his new life with her.

It’s nice living with someone else. If he’s being honest, he’ll probably miss her when she’s gone. Even if just a little.

Normally he wouldn’t give a clear answer, but he sees Hype-chan sleeping contently on the bed and says instead, “Alright.”

His mother gives a delighted sound. He glances back at Hype-chan and wonders how much change such a small child could bring about.

* * *

 

Hype-chan wakes up at the ungodly hour of four in the morning, which means Neku wakes up at the ungodly hour of four in the morning. He feeds her and changes her diaper and awkwardly plays with her when she’s not fussy. He feels self-conscious about it, especially when he tries to make silly noises and expressions, but the book Shiki gave him talked about playtime, and he doesn’t really know how else he’s supposed to spend time with Hype-chan when she’s not sleeping or drinking milk.

He’s just glad that no one’s there to tease him about it.

He tries saying the things mothers say on tv shows (“Who’s a good girl? Who’s a good girl? _You_ are!”), but the tone makes him sound stupid and it feels like talking to a dog rather than a baby. He eventually settles on talking to her like a real person, because that’s easier to do and it doesn’t make him feel as ridiculous.

Hype-chan is talkative for a baby though, and she doesn’t cry through the whole ordeal, which is definitely a plus.

“Yeah. And?”

“Aah waah ahh.”

“She said that?”

“Aaaaaah!”

“But what about the snakes?”

Their conversations are mostly one-sided (with the occasional drool dripping and tongue sticking out), but Neku does feel like he and Hype-chan are finally getting more comfortable with each other.

It’s not, well it’s not _fun_ , and he’s still self-aware about it, but he feels warm. It’s a nice feeling.

“Eah~”

“Mhm. Did the dinosaur find his hat?”

He’s tired, but he also sort of gets into it the more he talks to her. He makes up a couple of stories as they go along. He’s terrible at it; Rhyme could definitely do better, but Hype-chan doesn’t seem to mind. It’s both a relief and a disappointment when he sees her yawn.

“Tired already, huh?” Neku says. He bites back his own yawn. “Yeah, I would be too. You’ve been up for four hours. That’s the longest you’ve been awake, I think.”

He means to take her back to their room (it’s no longer just _his_ now), but then Neku notices a standoffish shadow in his makeshift art studio. When he opens the lights, he catches sight of a pretty pink crib standing conspicuously in the middle of the room.

“What the-?” Neku gives the crib a suspicious look, because he sure as hell didn’t ask or pay for this to be delivered. “How’d this get in here?”

It looks big and out of place, and very very pink, but Hype-chan seems to like it enough. It even has pillows and a colorful music mobile hanging above her. She coos and gives her new crib curious looks, and within minutes she’s fast asleep.

“Well, at least _you_ like it,” Neku says, a bit accusingly. He’s almost determined not to like it purely out of suspicion. It’s big and nice and costly, and Neku is wary of suspiciously free gifts as a rule. A folded piece of paper is taped on the mobile, pressed and written in very neat handwriting that Neku doesn’t recognize.

 

_Neku,_

_It has come to my attention that you might be in need of this. Think of it as a gift from me for taking the time to raise her. Though of course, I wouldn’t mind if you do decide to repay me. I can accept non-monetary payment~_

_Just kidding._

_\- Joshua_

 

He gives the letter an incredulous look, flip-flopping between gratitude and astonished disbelief. “That’s… pretty nice of you,” he says, knowing full well that Joshua isn’t here to hear him. He’s not sure how and why it crossed Joshua’s mind to buy him one, nor does he know what compelled him to be generous, but the prospect of being able to stretch in his own bed again is enough to make him smile.

He supposes it’s not so bad, if Joshua’s the one paying for it. There could be a catch, but by this point it’s useless to fight against catches when Joshua’s involved.

It’s not long before there is a knock on his door. Neku hurries to open it, thinking of whether he should snark or be honestly thankful. He doesn’t know why he expected Joshua to be there though – it’s not like the Composer visits him often, or at all (his last visit was the one and only exception to that rule) – so he forgets to hide his disappointment when he sees his mother at his door instead.

“Neku, I know you’re not a morning person but don’t frown like that,” his mother says, smiling. Unlike him, his mother is a basketful of sunshine even in the most ungodly of hours.

“S-sorry,” Neku says, letting her in. He pretends not to notice the way his mother looks at him, like she’s trying to read him because she knows there’s something going on.

He swears that mothers are probably secret mind-reading ninjas or something.

“Have you been eating, Neku?” she asks. “You look really thin.”

“’m just tired, I think.”

“Did you have breakfast? Let me make you some-”

“Mom, I didn’t ask you to come here to mother _me._ ”

“Of course, of course.” She walks inside, a little excitedly, and says, “Well, don’t just stand there, Neku. I want to see her!”

Neku rolls his eyes and pulls his mother to the crib before she can quip about when he’ll let her have grandchildren to coo over. He places the letter on the nearest desk to review later, and it sits there for days before Neku remembers it again.

* * *

 

“Dude, she’s so _tiny._ ”

“Um, duh? She’s a baby. Of course she’s tiny.”

“Yeah, but she’s _really_ small.”

“I think it would be a lot more alarming if she’s six feet tall, Beat.”

Beat gives Eri a look caught between exasperation and incredulity. Rhyme laughs beside him.

“I think she’s cute,” she says, peering over her brother’s shoulder. “And she looks really pretty in that bonnet. Did you make that, Shiki?”

Shiki nods, smiling brightly. “Yep! Eri was the one who thought of putting the flower on the side though. It adds a nice touch, don’t you think?”

“Of course it does!” Eri says, pressing her hands on Beat’s shoulders and practically _bouncing_ towards Neku. She must have woken up in a very good mood today. Neku tries not to think it’s because of the baby. “It’s a good match for Hype-chan. She likes the bonnet, yeah?”

“You’re so noisy,” Neku says, pushing Eri lightly out of the way. He notices Hype-chan’s eyes darting from one person to another, a little overwhelmed, so he brings her closer to his chest. “And no, Eri. She actually keeps trying to take it off. She just can’t do it yet.”

“Then why is she wearing it?” Rhyme asks. She tilts her head at Hype-chan, who is waving her arms around and trying out incomprehensible syllables that end up sounding like, “uhwaaah yah aha~”

Neku shrugs, as if it’s obvious. “Eri would throw a fit if I don’t make her wear it.”

“Hey!” Eri crosses her arms, and spends the next five minutes huffing next to Shiki.

They are meeting in front of Hachiko again, after so many weeks of postponing their lunch date. Neku is a bit nervous about it, honestly. He keeps Hype-chan close to himself and refuses to let anyone else hold her, at least until they move to a quieter place. Hachiko is near the station and the Crossing; it’s always full of people and noise. He’s worried that something – anything – might happen to her. Neku doesn’t trust himself to bring Hype-chan here at all.

He wouldn’t have left his apartment if Shiki and Eri hadn’t dragged him out here. “Come on Neku, you’ve been cooped up in there for _weeks_. You both need to see the sun too,” they said. Eri glared at him and Shiki gave him her most convincing pout, and that was the end of that.

“I still can’t believe you’re a dad now,” Beat says. He’s still coming to grips with the fact that there’s a _baby_ within their group. Not that Neku could blame him. “Dude, _seriously._ ”

“Is every word coming out of your mouth gonna be about how surprised you are?” Neku quips. “’Cause I think I’ve heard it all already.”

“We should have a dinner party or something,” Shiki says. She twirls her hair in thought. The strands are longer now, and dressed up in cute pins. “We haven’t gotten together to celebrate anything for a long time. Didn’t we used to have picnics _just because_? I kinda miss those days.”

“You’re all so busy lately that we haven’t had time for it,” Rhyme says. She shakes her head, smiling. “Well, I’ve been busy with college too. I think a dinner party is a good idea though. And I’ll bring Hype-chan story books! I have a bunch of them at home. You’d like that, right Hype-chan?”

“Aah!” Hype-chan says, still fidgeting and concentrating on how to remove the bonnet from her head. Rhyme giggles in response.

“Food’s on me then. But all I can bring is ramen, though.” Beat laughs at this, putting a hand behind his head. And then, on second thought, “And maybe pizza. And dumplings.”

Neku wrinkles his nose. “Ramen and pizza and dumplings?” The combination doesn’t sound appealing. Hype-chan sticks her tongue out too, as if she agrees with the sentiment. Neku is secretly proud of that.

“Hey, as long as it’s free! I’m not complaining.” Eri grins. “I have a meet-up on Saturday though, so can we have it on Sunday night? Ooh, sleepover at Neku’s~!”

“Hey now, that’s pushing it. Having Hype-chan over is enough trouble already. I don’t have time to babysit all of _you_.” Neku says, avoiding the shove coming his way. “Besides, my apartment’s too small to fit everyone anyway.”

“Then how about WildKat?” Shiki says. “That place is practically empty on most days anyway. I’m sure Mr. H won’t mind.”

Neku shrugs again, nodding in agreement. It has been a while since he last stepped inside the homey café, and he does kind of miss his art talks with Mr. H. There are a lot of things he hasn’t been able to do these days, and it kind of worries him that his phone hasn’t rung yet this week with the promise of a new project to work on. He has hit a few freelancing dry spells before. He was able to satisfy a few clients the past month, but with Hype-chan hanging over his head this dry spell could turn out to be more troubling.

He doesn’t want to blame the baby for it – it’s not her fault for existing – but Neku kind of wishes the transition in his life had been less abrupt.

“Hey Neku, can I hold her?” Beat asks as they make their way towards Cat Street.

Neku practically glares at him and faces Hype-chan away. “No,” he says firmly.

“Aw, don’t hog her yourself man!”

“She’s not some object you just _hog_. No means no.”

Rhyme brings a hand over mouth, laughing. “Neku’s like an overprotective mother hen, isn’t he?” she says, turning to both Shiki and Eri.

“He’s rather sweet about it,” Shiki says in a soft voice. She trails behind the boys so Neku doesn’t hear. “He keeps talking about how Hype-chan tires him out, but I think he doesn’t really mind. I don’t think he notices how much he adores her sometimes.”

Eri snorts at that. That sounds just like Neku, alright. “Neku’s not really an honest person when it comes to these things.” She rolls her eyes, turning her attention back to the two idiots in front.

“That’s not how you hold the- oh. Never mind.”

“Yo, this was my favorite shirt!”

Rhyme laughs again, smiling as the boys walk in front, completely oblivious to the world around them and talking semi-animatedly about Hype-chan (or at least in Beat’s case, because Neku still has a frown imprinted on his face). “It’s amazing what one person can do, huh? Or in this case, what one baby can do.”

“Yeah,” Eri says. “Who knew Neku could actually charm a kid to like him?”

* * *

 

WildKat is usually free of people. On most days, there would only be two or three hanging about. The small café is only ever busy during _those_ weeks, and even then there aren’t a lot of people lounging around as there are people hastily downing coffee and bagels in under five minutes. The most customers Hanekoma ever gets that are willing to stay and chat would probably amount to five or six, and it’s fairly obvious who those people are.

Neku is the one who visits him most often, though. WildKat is the perfect place for their conversations, and it’s quiet enough for Neku to keep his focus. Talking to CAT is an easy source of inspiration, and it’s also reassuring. Neku likes it here, because rarely does he ever have to worry about distractions or loud chatter interfering with his work.

Today is no exception, but WildKat is also usually free of Composers, at least whenever Neku announces his presence. He never crossed paths with Joshua before, and normally Neku wouldn’t mind that. He has come to accept this situation as a fact; Joshua’s latest appearance with the baby was merely an exception. Their meetings are always – _always_ – because of some hidden agenda. It’s only natural not to expect any casual encounters.

But he finds him there today, talking in a calm, hushed voice next to Hanekoma. It looks like a Very Important Discussion, and neither party seems happy about where the conversation is leading them. Joshua looks like he could be frowning, but Neku’s not sure.

What he does know is that Joshua’s taller now. Older. More authoritative. His features are sharper, and he looks worn and wiser than he ever did.

It’s the first time Neku sees him in an adult body. He looks… he looks good.

“Yoooo, Mr. H!” Beat yells, waving his hand to get the older man’s attention. He strolls in along with Eri, paying their private discussion no heed. “Have you seen Neku’s daughter yet?”

“What?” Neku chokes on his spit, which Hype-chan seems to find funny. She reaches up, trying to tug at his shirt again and cooing. Behind them, Rhyme and Shiki are hiding their smiles behind their hands.

Beat turns around, confused. “What do you mean ‘ _what’_?”

“She _is_ your daughter, in the loosest sense of the word. I don’t see why you keep getting embarrassed about it, Neku. She practically sees you as her dad now, anyway,” Eri says, crossing her arms. She shakes her head and walks over to the stereo before catching sight of ashen blond hair. She furrows her brows and mumbles to herself. “That looks familiar…”

Hanekoma sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. He gives Joshua a meaningful look before turning around to greet his new visitors. “Oh, didn’t think you’d be coming in today, Phones. She treating you well?” He gives a cheeky grin and receives one of Neku’s best half-glares for it. Neku can only imagine what business the two of them are up to this time.

“You _knew_ ,” Neku says accusingly as realization hit him. He holds Hype-chan closer, bouncing her as if to prove a point. “You _knew_ about this all along, didn’t you? Of course you did. You couldn’t have told me _before_ he decided to drop her into my life?”

“Eee~” Hype-chan yells happily. She clumsily brings her hands together to an awkward clap.

Hanekoma merely laughs, hearty and loud. “I don’t see the problem. She seems happy to be with you, Phones,” he says. He saunters over to the counter, humming. “Lemme make you guys something. You want anything with your cuppa?”

“A bagel, please,” Shiki says as she and Rhyme take the seats in front of the counter.

“Make that five,” Rhyme adds. “I’m sure everyone’s a bit hungry anyway.”

“Gotcha.” Hanekoma nods. He catches Joshua’s eyes again before disappearing to the back of the café. Neku watches the exchange warily.

“What was that all about?” he asks. Joshua turns his gaze at him, sharp and piercing.

“Nothing you have to be concerned about.” He retains a quiet disposition, an odd expression passing over him that Neku can’t quite describe. They stare each other down, but Neku feels like Joshua’s winning whatever competition they’re having. It’s a bit unnerving, the way he acts like he reads him like an open book, regardless of whether or not he actually can. It’s like a silent conversation only Joshua could understand, and it’s unsettling. Joshua _always_ has something to say.

The silence gnaws at Neku. He’s the first to look away.

“You look… different,” Beat says, circling Joshua.

“It’s still him, Beat,” Shiki says. She nods at the Composer. “It’s been a while, Joshua. Do you, uh, still remember us? What am I saying, of course you do…”

“I do,” Joshua says. He breaks the stare and turns to Shiki, smiling. “It _has_ been a while, Shiki.”

Eri gasps, her eyes widening as she nearly drops the CD she was about to play. “ _Wait_ a minute!” she exclaims. She bounds from the stereo and right by Shiki’s side in a flash. “ _Wait a flippin’ minute!_ It’s him, isn’t it?” She points at Joshua and gives him a good, hard look. “I _knew_ I’ve seen you before.”

“Ooh!” Hype-chan mimics. Neku groans, shaking his head. He can tell where this is going. “ _Eri…_ ”

Joshua raises an eyebrow, pointing at himself. “Me?” he asks, amusement evident in his voice.

“It is! It’s you! The Sketchbook Guy.” Eri gives Neku an accusatory look. “I can’t believe you’ve been hiding someone so _fashionable_ from me! You owe me a story, Sakuraba.”

“Don’t mind her,” Neku quickly says. “She’s delusional. She thinks you and I have been hiding an…” – he looks away, muttering the last words – “illicit love affair of some sort.”

“Oh?” Joshua giggles. “But aren’t we, Neku dear?”

Neku huffs. “Don’t egg her on, Joshua.”

Joshua tsks, shaking his head. “So uptight. And here I thought the baby would teach you to be more forgiving.” He smiles and offers a hand to Eri. “You must be Eri then. I’m Yoshiya Kiryu, though friends call me Joshua. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Trust me, the pleasure’s _all_ mine.” Eri grins. Neku doesn’t like that grin.

“Here ya go!” Hanekoma reappears from the back, bringing plates of bagels with him. ”Still hot! That’s not on the house, though.”

Eri ignores him, choosing instead to get some sort of story out of a helpless Shiki. Beat, however, gives an excited yell before wolfing down on his bagel, as if he didn’t just eat an hour ago.

Rhyme just laughs and gingerly takes a bite out of her own. Only Beat can sound excited over food. It’s part of what makes Beat endearing as a brother. “By the way, Mr. H,” she starts. “We were thinking of having a dinner celebration this Sunday. You know, for Hype-chan. Is it alright if we use this place? You’re invited, of course.”

“Huh, now there’s an idea.” Hanekoma brings his hand up, rubbing the stubble on his chin. “Sure! Why not? Anything for the little kid.”

“You’re invited too,” Neku says, turning to Joshua once again. It’s still strange seeing his adult form. He’s still composed, still acting like he’s always sharing an inside joke with himself. The way Joshua carries himself shouldn’t be any different, but the more Neku takes him in the more he sees a different Joshua. “You’ll come, right?”

Maybe he doesn’t know the Composer as well as he thought.

Joshua gives him that odd look again, the one Neku can’t describe. He can’t quite place a finger on it. But what he knows is that even now, even with Joshua standing just a few steps in front of him, he’s still unreachable.

“I live a busy life,” Joshua says carefully. It’s a tone Neku is not familiar with. Joshua’s _always_ sure of his words. “But I’ll try not to disappoint you, dear.”

This time he’s near, so easily within his grasp. And yet. And yet.

And yet, even with this, the distance only seems to grow.

“Yeah,” Neku mumbles. “Of course you will.”

Joshua gives him a light smirk. “You’ll have to repay me for the crib next time then. I’ll try to come.” And with that, he leaves the café. Hype-chan tugs at Neku’s shirt again, growing fussier and more tired.

It’s second nature now, the way Neku cradles Hype-chan to sleep and reaches for the pacifier hidden in his bag. It’s all so rote, he doesn’t even think about it. “Shh, it’s okay,” he says quietly. He brushes away her hair, blonde but not ashen.

It’s not often that it happens, but Neku knows longing when he feels it.

* * *

 

Shiki walks him home on most nights because she lives nearest to him. It’s more of a habit now than a thoughtful gesture. When they were younger they used to date, and Neku would walk her home even when she says it’s alright.

Neku misses those days sometimes. He looks at Shiki and thinks _she’s wonderful, she’s so wonderful_ , and doubts his sanity for letting her go.

(It’s for the best though, and that’s why they can be best friends.)

“She looks so peaceful when she’s asleep,” Shiki whispers. Neku lets her take the bonnet off. “Do you think babies dream?”

“I wouldn’t know. Maybe it’s one of the great mysteries of life,” Neku deadpans. His arms are starting to hurt from carrying her all day. Maybe he should get one of those strollers or something. “She looks so fragile, though. I’m kinda worried I might break her.”

Shiki laughs. “You won’t. You worry too much, Neku.”

They walk the last block in silence. Even now, with the day coming to an end, there’s still so much light and noise around them. The sun is setting, but the city is bright and alive. Shibuya never sleeps and it never rests.

Neku wonders, sometimes, how Joshua keeps up with it all.

“Hey, Neku? I don’t think he means it,” Shiki says before they part ways. She clasps her hands behind her back, the way she always does when she’s not sure of what to say. “I don’t know him as well as you do, and I know this is important to you.”

He stares at her, knowing just _who_ she means, but not where she’s coming from. Shiki gives him a thoughtful look, reading his eyes the way Joshua doesn’t know how. Joshua can recognize emotions, but Shiki _knows_ him.

“But I don’t think he means it,” she finishes, strangely serious. “Hurting you, I mean.”

Neku snorts. “I’m not _hurt._ ”

“Maybe.” Shiki scrutinizes him, and Neku feels naked in front of her. “But you’re lonely.”

“ _What?_ ”

“You miss him.”

Neku blinks. “… So?”

“You’re impossible sometimes, Neku,” Shiki says, huffing. She crosses her arms, but loses her firmness as she elaborates. “I don’t know him, obviously. But just a while ago, he seems… I don’t know, scared? No, more like hesitant. When you talk about him, your conversations always sound the same. It’s always about banter. I don’t think both of you know how to communicate in any other way. And that’s why. That’s why I think he’s scared.”

Neku scoffs. “He’s not scared. He never has been.”

“Everyone’s scared of something Neku. You know that.”

Neku doesn’t respond, because he _does_ know that. That everyone sees the world from different perspectives; that everyone has their own skeletons they’re not willing to show. There’s no reason to think that Joshua is no less human than the rest of them.

But he’s so far above, so out of reach and closed off. With his gun and his games, it’s easy to see him as fearless.

Hype-chan squirms in his arms, tugging his clothes _again_ before settling down and drooling all over his shirt. Shiki giggles at him.

“I should get going then,” she says. “And… don’t think too hard about what I said. I might be wrong, and I know how much you overanalyze everything. Get some sleep, Neku. Kiss Hype-chan goodnight for me, okay?”

She smiles at him, leaves a quick peck on his cheek (another habit, and one Neku doesn’t want to grow out of in all honesty), and leaves.

He enters his apartment quietly and distracts himself from his thoughts. He listens to the buzz of the city, strains his ears to hear it hum with life, but it says nothing of its Composer.

* * *

 

_Won’t make it tonight. Try not to miss me too much. - Joshua_

 

Neku stares at the little post-it note and frowns.

“I know I’m used to seeing you like that, but I still maintain that frowning is not an attractive look on you,” Shiki says. She walks around Neku to take a peek at the yellow note on his hand. “What are you worried about?”

“Nothing,” Neku says too fast. He pulls the note away, shoving it in his pocket. “Is Eri gonna meet us there?”

“Yep! She said she had things to set up.”

“Things?”

Shiki shrugs. “I have no idea. But don’t worry. Rhyme is with her, so it can’t be _too_ bad.”

If anything, Neku’s frown deepens into a scowl.

Shiki sighs, a little bit of fondness decorating her smile. “Lighten up, Neku. Any more of that and you might not be able to teach Hype-chan how to smile.”

“It’s Haruka,” Neku says absent-mindedly.

“I’m sorry?”

Neku brings his hand up to rub the back of his neck. “Uh, her name. I bought this book with a list of names and I still couldn’t pick one. So I tossed it in the crib and joked about how she should just pick her own name. It opened to this page, and when I looked back Hype was batting at it and drooling over it until the name ‘Haruka’ was covered in spit, and I thought that’s a good enough name.”

“So she’s Haruka-chan now?” Shiki’s eyes light up. She walks over to the crib and lifts the baby up, cooing at her. “Hear that Hype-chan? Daddy’s picked a name for you! Now this _really_ calls for a celebration.”

Haruka closes her fists on Shiki’s cardigan and stares up at her with wide eyes.

“Will you stop calling me that?” Neku says from across the room. “It’s creepy.”

Shiki rolls her eyes, choosing not to comment. “I bet Eri’s still gonna call you Hype-chan, though. Speaking of which, we should get going. Everybody’s probably waiting for us there.”

And with that Neku opens the door and they leave for Cat Street. Shiki carries Haruka in her arms this time, smiling at her and engaging her in baby talk. It’s a comfortable walk, filled with the quiet warmth Neku openly shares with Shiki and Haruka. Shiki visits so often and coddles the baby so much that Neku thinks Haruka’s starting to recognize her.

For his part, Neku prefers keeping his more affectionate moments with Haruka private. But with Shiki he loosens up a little, and soon he finds himself smiling and playing with them on the streets. It’s a very lighthearted moment. Shiki’s eyes are bright, and she grins whenever she gets a sort-of smile from the baby. It’s fun, if Neku’s being honest. He’s still not comfortable leaving Haruka in someone else’s hands, but Shiki is fine. He trusts her.

He ignores the way people around them assume they’re some new, young family, or how conscious he is of the yellow note shoved deep in his pocket.

“Now that’s the Neku I know.” Shiki grins, poking Neku’s cheek after Neku takes Haruka back in his arms.

“What?”

“You haven’t been smiling,” Shiki says, as if that answers everything. “I know that’s not your default expression, but you’re sulkier and quieter than usual lately. You’re never like that unless…” She trails off, pausing their walk and locking eyes with Neku. Whatever she means to say never reaches past her eyes however. She shakes her head. “Never mind. I’m just glad you cheered up somewhat.”

Neku arches an eyebrow, but Shiki walks ahead before he could get a word in. Soon enough, they have reached the evasive café.

“Neku! Shiki!” Eri calls out as the little bells on the café’s door tinkle. Rhyme waves a hand at them from the floor while Eri stands up and bounces up to them, full of energy. “And Hype-chan too! It’s about time you guys showed up.”

“The sun hasn’t even set yet,” Neku drawls as he steps inside. Eri ignores him and fishes something out of her bag.

“I got you something, cutie patootie,” she says, grinning at Haruka. Shiki laughs at the namesake. “Shiki made this juuuuuust for you. Ta daaaa! Meet Mr. Mewmew!”

She brings up a Mr. Mew clone in front of Haruka’s face excitedly. It’s black, and it looks like a cross between a pig and a cat. But the stitches are neater and the fabric looks brand new. It’s like an exact replica, but better.

Haruka eyes the stuffed toy curiously and waves her arms clumsily around it.

“She likes it,” Neku says, an amused smile spreading on his face. He’ll have to remember not to call it a pig in front of Shiki though, despite appearances.

“I’m glad,” Shiki says, smiling back. “By the way, what were you setting up?”

Rhyme pipes up from the other side of the room, holding a mic up in the air. “Karaoke!”

Neku blanches. “Oh no.”

“Oh _yes_ ,” Eri says, smirking at Neku. “And you’re not getting away this time, Sakuraba.”

“But I’m tone deaf.”

“Yeah right. You can’t be _that_ bad.”

Rhyme pushes herself off the floor and joins the group in their table. They have WildKat all to themselves tonight. She and Eri cleared out all the unnecessary clutter until there’s only a couple of tables joined together for their group, a karaoke box set up beside it, a set of pillows lining the walls, and a stereo in the corner with enough music in their playlist to last them the night.

“Rhyme!” Neku says. “You’re the sensible one, aren’t you? Why’d you let _her_ pick what to do tonight?”

Rhyme blinks. “But you look like you needed to unwind. Isn’t that what karaoke is for?”

Shiki giggles. She gently removes Mr. Mewmew from Haruka’s mouth and ignores the glare Neku sends her way. “Well, that _is_ pretty sensible of her, Neku. Rhyme is a very considerate friend.” She sighs a little, wiping the saliva coating Mr. Mewmew’s left ear and pacifying Haruka’s fussy grabbing.

The door opens with a small tinkle, and the smell of delicious food wafts through the air. Beat comes in with Hanekoma in tow, bringing pizza boxes and ramen bowls to the table. “Yo! Sorry to keep you guys waiting,” he says. “We suddenly had lots of customers coming in this afternoon. Couldn’t sneak out early.”

“Nah, I don’t care. As long as there’s food!” Eri happily takes the pizza boxes out of Beat’s hands and nearly gets away with hoarding them to herself. After much fussing and laughing at Eri’s expense, and various comments about how pizza and ramen and dumplings do _not_ go well together, they gather around the table and set the food down in a sort-of buffet. Neku sits cross-legged in his chair, eating only when he thinks Haruka doesn’t need his attention.

Hanekoma lifts his glass up for a toast. “To Hype-chan!”

“It’s Haruka,” Neku corrects. Nevertheless, he brings his glass up too for the toast.

“Eh, I’m still gonna stick with Hype-chan though,” Eri says, shrugging. She leans over and swipes a dumpling off Shiki’s plate.

“Hey, is that prissy kid coming over?” Beat asks, mouth part full. Neku’s mood sours and Eri gives Beat a light punch to the shoulder. “Ow! I guess that’s a no, then?”

“Beat!” Shiki says from the other end of the table.

Hanekoma watches the scene unfold, amused.

“Forget about it,” Neku says, shaking his head. He plasters on a small smile, absentmindedly brushing Haruka’s hair with his hand. “He’s not here, so he can’t ruin this party.”

Hanekoma breaks into a grin and gives a hearty laugh. “That’s the spirit, Phones! I’m sure J would want to come though.”

Eri twirls her chopsticks between her fingers, smirking. “Although you do sound like your boyfriend just stood you up.”

“I’m just gonna pretend you don’t exist in this room, Eri.” Haruka coos, and Neku looks down at her with a serious expression. “Hey, from now on you don’t have an aunt Eri, okay? I know. I’m relieved too.”

A stray noodle flies up to Neku’s hair in an instant, droplets of broth flinging from Eri’s chopsticks. “Oops,” she says. “My chopsticks slipped.”

Beat laughs, accidentally toppling his bowl of ramen on the table. The soup spills down the edge and onto the floor, staining Eri’s stylish blouse in the process. “Oh, oh no,” he says, horrified. He melts away under Eri’s stony look. “Oh no. Oh _shit_ ,”

“Ugh, Beat!” Eri cries out, scolding him.

Neku covers Haruka’s ears. “Not in front of the kid!” he says.

More noodles expertly find their way in Beat’s beloved beanie. Eri points her chopsticks at him, declaring war. Neku holds Haruka close and scoots away slowly from Eri’s side as Beat holds a plate up in defense, saying something along the lines of “I give, I give! Calm down, woman!”

Shiki gives Neku an amused smile. “Taking refuge from the war?”

“Save me,” Neku deadpans, sidling up next to her.

Hanekoma laughs. He rests his chin on his hand and surveys the room. “Hm, strewn food aside, I like what you did to the place.”

Rhyme beams up at him from her place near the stereo. She rifles through their playlist for an upbeat, feel-good song. “Thanks, Mr. H! Oh, and sorry Shiki, I forgot to put Def March music in this.”

Shiki waves her hand airily, narrowly missing the onion flung her way. “It’s okay. Though it’s been a while since I’ve heard from them. Didn’t they say they were gonna release a new album last year?”

“Yeah, they were already working on it. But then 777 posted on their blog that they were putting the band on hiatus for a while.” Neku shrugs. “It was on short notice.”

“Maybe they had other things to do?” Rhyme says. “Like… playing a game.”

Hanekoma pats her on the back reassuringly. “Don’t worry. They’re still around. Leading a double life can take a toll on you when you’re famous, y’know?”

A sound most certainly resembling a cross between laughter and a shriek escapes from Eri’s throat. Everyone looks back at the terrible mess the other two caused. They find Eri laughing hysterically on the floor, with Beat hunched over her. “Ha! I win,” he says triumphantly.

“You – haha! – you tickled me! Shit, stop – haha! Stop that!”

Neku covers Haruka’s ears again. “I don’t think those two are stopping anytime soon.”

Shiki watches them with a fond look, then turns to the rest of the group. “So. Karaoke?”

* * *

 

Much of the night’s entertainment comes from flinging insults at everyone’s singing talents (or lack thereof) than from the actual singing. After Beat and Eri calmed down, and a quick clean-up of the place, they all grab their pillows and gather around the karaoke box to argue about who sings what first.

Neku sits down on the floor with the rest of them and props Haruka’s head on a pillow beside him. She’s drowsy, Neku knows. He gives her the pacifier and puts Mr. Mewmew beside her.

“This looks more like a sleepover than a dinner party,” Shiki comments as they wait for Eri, Beat, and Hanekoma to decide on whether to sing _Bohemian Rhapsody_ or _Eye of the Tiger_.

Hanekoma secures the mic first before anyone thinks of grabbing it. He is surprisingly enthusiastic and passionate about singing. He puts a lot of feeling into the words, closing his eyes and putting his hand to his chest as if he’s deeply moved by the song. Unfortunately, no one can suppress their laughter as he tries, and fails, to come off as cool and suave. The applause is a mix of giggle-snorts and actual clapping, because the man is at least confident enough to end the song smoothly.

“Way to go, Mr. H!” Beat howls, mid-laugh.

They draw lots next. Rhyme chooses an upbeat pop song and pulls Shiki in for a duet. Their voices mesh together wonderfully. They lack the flourish Hanekoma or Eri are more than ready to pull off, but they’re sweet and cheerful about it. The song Rhyme chooses is a catchy one, and everyone joins in before the first chorus even ends.

“Alright Phones, your turn!” Beat says, handing the mic to Neku.

“Wha-? No! I told you guys, I’m tone-deaf.”

“You don’t have to make excuses, Neku,” Eri says, lying contently on the floor.

“Dude, you’re always wearing those headphones anyway.” Beat shoves the mic into Neku’s hand and yanks him up. “There’s no _way_ you can’t sing.”

“We’ll try not to laugh,” Rhyme assures him. Shiki gives him two thumbs up, and Hanekoma takes away his pillow before he can think of sitting down.

Neku scowls at them. “Fine. Don’t blame me if your ears bleed.” He scans the song list and picks an easy one, something without the ridiculous high notes. He brings the mic up to his mouth, breathes in, and sings.

The whole room goes quiet. No one utters a word until Neku finishes his song.

“Wow, Neku,” Shiki says, unsure of what to say. Beside her, Rhyme bites the smile threatening to show. “That’s... Wow.”

Beat and Eri, however, does away with tact and practically guffaw on the floor. “Oh man,” Beat says in between breaths. Eri is too busy laughing and gasping for air to comment properly. “You were _horrible_.”

Hanekoma, Neku thinks, is the worst of them all. He looks torn between laughter and pity, and ultimately decides to pat him on the back and reassure him that “at least you know Haruka won’t inherit any singing skills from you.”

“I did warn you guys,” Neku says. It’s the closest he’ll get to saying _I told you_ so. But the night is still young. He decides to get his revenge when it’s Beat’s turn to sing.

The night goes on, and Haruka is fussy and tired before it’s over. She wakes up from her nap and wails and cries until Rhyme puts on a lullaby and Neku takes her in his arms and cradles her. Eri scrambles to the floor to give her Mr. Mewmew while Beat fluffs up the pillow she’s been using and clears the area. She doesn’t calm down for a while, and that’s when Neku calls it a night for them.

“Sorry guys. You can go on without me,” he says, rubbing gentle circles on Haruka’s back. “I’m gonna take Haruka home.”

Shiki nods. “We’ll clean up over here, don’t worry.”

Neku waits until Haruka tires herself to sleep before leaving. By the time he arrives at their apartment, it’s still somewhat early in the night. He puts Haruka on the crib beside his bed (he doesn’t feel comfortable not having her near him at all times) and collapses on his pillow, dead tired but smiling. He’s too tired to change his clothes, but he loosens up, and thinks that even though things have changed, everything else stayed the same. Maybe having Haruka in his life isn’t so bad.

His hand unconsciously traces the outline of the post-it note in his pocket, and it’s the last thing he thinks about before finally drifting to sleep.


End file.
